oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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