love makes seman taste better
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
