Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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