How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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