The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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