We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
