I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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