Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize