I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I am naked and annoyed.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
im on a boat
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