He is such a slut. More and more my type.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize