yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
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