idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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