he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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