My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
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