ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
