You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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