No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
When are your genitals available?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
