Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
