she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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