he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
i think we sleep fucked last night...
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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