Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
