I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
