meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
