god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
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