Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
