Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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