I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
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The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize