I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I will pee on everything he values.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
