Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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