sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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