I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
In other news, I just burned my penis
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
