Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
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