He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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