I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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