she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize