So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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