im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
