I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
