I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
