I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
