It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Randomize
