Where did you get a picture of my penis
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
