can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
