More tranny stories later!
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
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