When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
