Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
what day is it and did you see me today?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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