Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
