This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize
