i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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