No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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