Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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